Have you ever got a gift that you wanted to give back? Like that fuzzy sweater vest with a stack of books and an apple embossed on it that your grandma bought you for your thirteenth birthday, because vests were “cool”? Oh, grandma. We’ve all had that experience. There are gifts we want to exchange, ones we want to regift, ones we wish we could burn…etc. Just like critique.
It is the toughest part about being a writer. Not the thinking of ideas. Not the writer’s block. It’s the critique. Now, some people thrive on it, but most writers do not. If they say they do, I smell someone boating down the river denial! This is why the review or query process of one’s works is the most nail-biting, chocolate-consuming, and curse word-inducing experience.
I know it is for me. As a writer, I’ve spent a lot of time working on something. Weaving together all the words whirling around in me into what I hope is a good story. The stories I write are the babies that I have nurtured in my creative womb and pushed out into the world. So, it’s natural that I would be a little protective and emotional about them. However, despite what my mother may have thought about me, no baby is perfect. Babies poop, they are sticky, they whine, they put things in their mouth…etc. Just like our stories.
Critique helps us guide our story (baby) into what it can become. Now, not all critique is value-added, but much is. Getting others to take a look at your work will only help you become a stronger writer. In the short time that I have been focused on my writing, I have found the critique from the editors I’ve worked with, the Read & Critique groups I’ve joined with other Romance Writers, my Beta Readers, fellow writers at conferences, and even that pesky literary agent, who will remain nameless, that made me (just for a minute) question my writing as a mere premature midlife crisis all helped develop me as a writer. Clearly I am still in development!
Critique is a gift. We can choose to unwrap it, use it, toss it away, put it in a drawer, or hand it off to another person, but we should always accept it. Even if we don’t do anything with it. When someone takes the time to read your work and offer feedback, they are telling you that they believe in your ability and want to help support you on your journey. Even if their feedback doesn’t make sense to you, accept it in the spirit it was given to you. Just like I did with that hideous sweater from my grandma. That OG fugly sweater later came in handy for one of my high school’s homecoming dress up days, Nerd Day. If I hadn’t accepted that fantastically uncool sweater, I would have never been the Queen of the Nerds that day!
So, here’s my gift to you. Embrace critique. You don’t have to use it. As well, the critique says nothing about you as a person or your talent. What it does say is that someone believes enough in you to offer you feedback so you can continue to bloom!
Pinkies up!
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